Rebecca M. Douglass, Author

It's been a long time, so I thought I'd take an hour or so to give you some flash fiction. This one's more like half a flash, or maybe half-flashed, because it's just over 500 words, and I wrote it in a hurry. I went to the random title generators (about 4 of them) and collected a pretty good list of titles that might interest me at some point, but weren't right for a fast and barely-edited flash. This one did it. Enjoy the flash fiction, and enjoy your weekend! The Boyfriend of Truth It was all due to a simple misunderstanding. If my ears hadn’t been full of water from swimming, I’d have heard her name correctly, and I’d never have gone near her.  But my ears were blocked, and when Hilary introduced us I thought the girl’s name was Ruth. That’s what I called her the whole time we were going out, and she never corrected me. Which, when I think about it, is kind of weird, because she wasn’t Ruth, which means sorrow or pity. She was Truth, which can be rather pitiless

This week’s Friday Flash is truly flash fiction—something I’ve whipped off late Thursday because I’ve been too busy to do anything and now my guys are using my computer to watch Game of Thrones, so I can’t even do a photo page. But I did have dust bunnies on my mind, due to spending the last 3 days packing books. So here you have it... a 20-minute story. In the Kingdom of Dust Bunnies Everyone has heard about the dust bunnies that hold sway under the beds. They are large and fierce, it is true. But the dust bunnies most to be feared are the ones who have build their civilization behind the books on the shelves. ### King Algernon had enjoyed a long and uneventful rule. No one had disturbed the Kingdom of Books for so long that the inhabitants had long since moved beyond the crude dust bunny stage and become sophisticated purveyors of a highly literate civilization. Rather than lurking under a bed, waiting to dodge a dust mop, Algernon lingered over his morning tea and surveyed the town.

The Wendig Challenge this week was to write a story that had something to do with food. I'm still neck deep in prepping our house for sale (looking at every. single. book. to decided if it goes or stays...), so there was no time or mental energy to write a story. But I remembered this one, which fits the requirement, though it feels a little odd to post humor in response to a memorial sort of thing--Wendig's call for stories was inspired by the death of Anthony Bourdain. Still: food. And I don't think many of you saw if the first time around, in 2013! This one is meant for the kiddies. Well, and the grownups. The Tomb of the Strange Feast Mom never was a good cook, but that night she really outdid herself.  Her smile when she brought in dinner didn't convince even Lily, and she's only five. "Brussels sprout-tofu casserole, with non-fat cheese," Mom announced, all bright and enthusiastic, the way grown-ups sound when they are trying to convince kids of the

This week Chuck Wendig's challenge was to take a title from Stephen King... and write a completely different story. Since I don't read horror, I don't know much about any of the books he listed, but this one I hadn't even heard of. I'm pretty sure this isn't what King did with it, and I'm doubly sure he never turned it into humor so I'll claim the bonus points he offered for changing genre. In 870 words, I give you... Under the Dome It sat on the table like an overgrown metal mushroom, and we all tried to pretend we didn't see it. It wasn't easy. Smooth, rounded, silver... it drew the eye, and our desire grew with the passage of time. Not so much a desire for what lay under the dome, as a desire to know. I could lift the dome, end the suspense. I wasn't a child anymore. I didn't take orders from anyone, nor did any of us gathered there. But she said not to touch it, and she commanded our obedience, if not our respect. No one touched the g

  Flashback Friday is a monthly meme that takes place on the last Friday of the month . The idea is to give a little more love to a post you’ve published on your blog before.  Maybe you just love it, maybe it’s appropriate for now, or maybe it just didn’t get the attention it deserved when you first published it. Thanks to Michael d’Agostino, who started it all, there is a solution – join Flashback Friday! Just join in whenever you like, repost one of your own blog posts , including any copyright notices on text or media, on the last Friday of the month. Use the Flashback Friday logo above, as designed by Michael d’Agostino. Link it back to host Jemima Pett (there's a linky list!) and add a link to your post in the comments on Jemima's post (or mine, or any other participant's). Since Friday is my flash fiction day, I've been sharing stories from the archives. This one dates back to 2013, and since it is a mystery featuring my heroine, JJ MacGregor of Pismawallops

We were back this week to one of my favorite flash fiction challenges, over there in Wendig land: the subgenre mash-up. After a few tries (to avoid some genres I don't deal in), the magic dice gave me "comic fantasy" and "occult detective." That seemed to go nicely with a story I had already begun, based on some half-sleeping idea that came to me early one morning. 1000 words exactly. 333 “Really, 333, you must try harder.” Disturbed from his reading, the demon pushed his glasses up and folded the morning edition of The Infernal Times into a better position for reading. “I must?” “You aren’t half the demon your father was, may he rest in pieces.” 333 raised a chiseled eyebrow. “No one is half the demon Dear Old Dad was.” “But we had such hopes of you! That’s why they gave you that number!”
 “To remind me every day that I’m at best half of what old 666 was?” The Demonic Division Chief ground his teeth. He did that a lot, especially around 333. That was why he had

  Title: The Whipping Boy Author: Sid Fleischman Publisher: Greenwillow Books, 1986. 90 pages. Source: Library Publisher's Summary: A shout comes echoing up the stairway "Fetch the whipping boy!" A young orphan named Jemmy rouses from his sleep. "Ain't I already been whipped twice today? Gaw! What's the prince done now? It was forbidden to spank, thrash, or whack the heir to the throne. Jemmy had been plucked from the streets to serve as whipping boy to the arrogant and spiteful Prince Brat. Dreaming of running away, Jemmy finds himself trapped in Prince Brat's own dream at once brash and perilous. In this briskly told tale of high adventure, taut with suspense and rich with colorful characters, the whipping boy and Prince Brat must at last confront each other. Award-winning author Sid Fleischman again blends the broadly comic with the deeply compassionate in this memorable novel.  
 My Review:   Every now and then I snag a classic that I never re

It's the last Friday of the month, and that means time for FlashBack Friday! It's every blogger's chance to take a little break and re-run a post that you really like, or wish had gotten more attention. Join in! Just add the logo, and jump over to Jemima Pett's post where she's managing the hop and add your link in the comments. Then visit the other participants to see what else you might have missed! I found this food-related flash fiction to share in honor of Thanksgiving. I might have used it before, but I still like it. The narrator does find in the end he has a lot to be grateful for. What’s for Dinner? Mom’s acting weird.  Well, that’s kind of normal, if you follow me, because she’s always weird, but usually she’s weird like wearing strange clothes and working all night on one of those bizarre sculptures she makes.  I won’t ever tell her this, but I don’t like them.  They have too many jagged edges.  They’ll tear holes in you if you get too close.  I sometimes

  #M is for Melly But first, a bonus M character. Mariusz: In a nutshell: bullishly confident ruler of Castle Hattan, and head of the Wozna cola 'global' enterprise, explorer of time tunnels and places he shouldn't put his nose into.   Strong sense of right and wrong, as long as right is in his favour. Biggest secret: he's really very kind and considerate, especially with his employees, as long as they don't notice. Mariusz is from the Princelings of the East series .    Now for the featured character! In a nutshell: Melly is a kitchen-wench in a village in Duria, where Halitor meets her under difficult circumstances. She has a mission to accomplish and she’ll do whatever she must to do it. Biggest secret : her real name. (What? You think I'm giving that away?) Favorite line:  Halitor is worried that Melly might be a princess, since she's just needed rescuing from an ogre. She responds, "Princesses don't peel potatoes.

Two-for One: L is for Lars and Larry Today it's one from my stories, one from Jemima Pett.  Lars Nilsson In a nutshell: Asteroid miner with a murky past and uncertain temper, trying to get through life with as much leisure to enjoy women as possible Biggest secret: His motto may be 'if you can't beat them, join them' Lars is one of the central characters in the Viridian System books by Jemima Pett . The second character is mine: Larry the disembodied eyeballs. In a nutshell: Larry is the manifestation of the AI/onboard computer of the good ship Wanderlust, home of Xavier Xanthum, Space Explorer. Being an AI, he thinks fast and knows everything, but has a little trouble with things that require hands. Biggest Secret: Larry is trying hard to develop a sense of humor and other human attributes. Xavier, Larry, and the Wanderlust (and the ship's cat, Kitty Comet), feature in a series of flash fiction on this blog. Stories about the intrepid space explorers appear

Chuck Wendig's clearly feeling a bit down. After last week's apocalypse challenge, this week we were to write our greatest fear. I've already done that once , so I put my tongue in my cheek for 998 words of the greatest terror of my kids' generation. Nightmare Our nightmare began at 7:52 p.m. I know that because the time kept blinking from my useless phone, a vicious reminder of what had been lost between one minute and the next. At 7:51 we were all safe and content in our own worlds, chatting with friends in distant cities, reading newspapers from around the world. Watching cat videos. And at 7:52 it was all gone as though it had never been. Our Internet service had crashed. When we recovered from our initial shock, we slunk into the kitchen, avoiding each others’ eyes as we fumbled with unfamiliar foods, unable to look up cooking instructions on line. Dinner was an awkward meal with each person staring fixedly at a screen, willing it to come back to life. Josh finally

Title: Dragons at Crumbling Castle and Other Tales Author: Terry Pratchett, read by Julian Rhind-Tutt Publisher: Listening Library 2015. Hardcover by Clarion, 2014 (337 pages). Source: Library digital resources Publisher's Blurb: Dragons have invaded Crumbling Castle, and all of King Arthur's knights are either on holiday or visiting their grannies. It's a disaster!   Luckily, there's a spare suit of armour and a very small boy called Ralph who's willing to fill it. Together with Fortnight the Friday knight and Fossfiddle the wizard, Ralph sets out to defeat the fearsome fire-breathers.   But there's a teeny weeny surprise in store...   Fourteen fantastically funny stories from master storyteller Sir Terry Pratchett, full of time travel and tortoises, monsters and mayhem!   My Review: I wasn't quite sure if I was going to be disappointed, because these were among Pratchett's earliest published stories, and you know how that can go. I needn't

What with pounding away on my NaNo novel and finalizing the formatting and all for The Problem With Peggy (see below), there really was no time this week for a new story. So I dug into the archives, and as a way to get warmed up for Thanksgiving feasting (for my US readers!), I bring you again, The Tomb of the Strange Feast Mom never was a good cook, but that night she really outdid herself.  Her smile when she brought in dinner didn't convince even Lily, and she's only five. "Brussels sprout-tofu casserole, with non-fat cheese," Mom announced, all bright and enthusiastic, the way grown-ups sound when they are trying to convince kids of the wonderfulness of something they really don't like it.  Totally fake.  Mom could pretend, but we all knew she didn't like the food she made any more than we did.  She didn't even put crumbled potato chips on top of the stuff, the way Nana does, which at least means there's some part of her “hot dishes” a kid can eat

  Title: Chomp Author: Carl Hiaasen. Read by James Van Der Berk Publisher: Listening Library, 2012. Originally by Knopf, 2012, 290 pages Source: Library (on-line resources) Publisher's Summary: Wahoo Cray lives in a zoo. His father is an animal wrangler, so he's grown up with all manner of gators, snakes, parrots, rats, monkeys, snappers, and more in his backyard. The critters he can handle.  His father is the unpredictable one. When his dad takes a job with a reality TV show called "Expedition Survival!", Wahoo figures he'll have to do a bit of wrangling himself—to keep his dad from killing Derek Badger, the show's boneheaded star, before the shoot is over. But the job keeps getting more complicated. Derek Badger seems to actually believe his PR and insists on using wild animals for his stunts. And Wahoo's acquired a shadow named Tuna—a girl who's sporting a shiner courtesy of her old man and needs a place to hide out. They've only b

When I'm shooting for a daily word count, it's not the final thousand or so that cause trouble. It's words 1-100, sometimes 1-200. In other words, getting started. This is not a post about how to fix that problem. This is a  post about how not to. For those of you wondering how to do it right, here's how to accomplish very little writing: Step one : Read the paper over breakfast. All of it. Pause occasionally to play Word With Friends. Step two: Check all your social media sites. Remind yourself that this is really working, because your social media presence is important. Go back and check Facebook again, because important things might have happened to someone while you were reading about the effects of climate change in Greenland. Return to other sites to read a few trip reports. Drift off into a fantasy of loading up your backpack and hitting the trail. Step three: Open your computer files. Set up the desktop how you like it. Look at the clock. Step four:  Read a bit